Don't stick it in your ears... stick it to someone else's.
Have you ever wanted to carry a weapon in your pocket without getting into trouble? How about the tiny Micro Blaster X-Bow? This crossbow is fully functional, but different from a real crossbow due to a number of things. First is that it measures 4” x 3½”, which allows it to fit inside your pockets. Next is that it uses cotton swabs as ammo, making it safe yet still usable as a tool for shooting projectiles at officemates across the room.
